This thread's time has come.


An Ode To Nova

Look to the sky!
Nova, does he fly?
His helmet polished,
A knob of steel.
A yellow outfit,
It’s so ideal!

And thus unto the gods came Nova,
And thus we were laid upon by he,
And he laid upon us,
And so it was.

Take to the stars!
Nova, in stripper bars?
His “helmet” polished,
A knob of steel?
That yellow outfit,
I want to steal!

Nova. Spova. Tinker totter trova.
Globe trotter, train spotter.
Nova.

And thus unto the gods came Nova,
And thus we were laid upon by he,
And he laid upon us,
And so it was.

Coast, Coast, My Avengers Do Coast

Of West Coasts and Great Lakes,
The Windy City doth blow.
From my heels come the Thunder God,
A man of iron,
Together, in my skies.

But Wanda, Wanda, your loss was so great!
Dark did you become, your husband pale in the snow.

Is he a toaster? An oven? A device without feel?
Can he cook, clean, prepare me a meal?
Oh Vision, my Vision, oh what have they done?
That thing in her oven, it is not a bun.

Of Great Lakes and West Coasts,
The Big Apple doth die,
From whence comes the Bendis?
A balding man,
Wolverine? He lies.

But Hawkeye, Hawkeye, yes you were the best!
A bow did you wield, shoot not the Black Knight.

Like A Thespian

Mr. Kirby,
You know me,
I lurk at your door.

Mr. Stan Lee,
You need me,
I won’t be a bore.

I know you,
And need you,
To dress up my home.

I’ll get you,
And keep you,
And stuff all your bones.

Encased in,
All that tin,
My robots all smile.

I won’t sin,
I’ll keep him,
My Kirby’s worthwhile.

I stuffed Jack,
Don’t smoke crack,
Decorate my house.

And stuffed Stan,
A stuffed man,
Now quiet like mouse.

Iron Fist's Lament

Iron Fist, Iron Fist,
Let me say, you have been missed.
A lament for you, the toil you’ve seen.
We weep, despair!
Our hearts heavy.

Daredevil costume in your drawer,
Vomit on the floor.
Drinking problems, bottled solutions,
Fabric torn and worn. Are you Iron Man?
A cascade
Of solitude,
From which your Iron Fist cannot escape.

A cancer’s growth,
A sly, a shiver.
Power Man, where have you gone
When we need you the most?
Luke Cage, Caged Luke, John Wayne, The Duke?
You are black and where chains.

Hiring heroes, Heroes For Hire!
Lest we are dragged into the muck and mire.

Of Headgear And Fries

Dr. Doom I think you’re goofy,
With that silly mask you wear,
And if I had an inkling,
I wedge your underwear

Right into the crack
At the bottom of your back
‘Cause that’s the kind of guy I am.

Magneto, you wear that helmet,
Upon your ugly head,
And if I had a dollar,
I’d pay to make you dead

Or maybe a vampire
Come on light my fire
‘Cause that’s the kind of guy I am.

The Tale Of The Black Knight

Black Knight
You Appeared
In Journey Into Mystery.
Thor?
You can’t fight him!

I like your armor. It is shiny and nice.
You have a nice shield.
I’m glad you have your horse to that chick.
I always thought it would be cool if, like, you and Hawkeye and Captain America and some other dude got together and were a team with various weapons and stuff.

Man, you were a cool Avenger. Not as cool as Hawkeye, but close.

Black Knight,
Your helmet,
Headgear, I say.
Gay?
Northstar.
Alpha Flight, not Avengers.
Black Knight!
Where is your horse?
It is a horse
(of course).

I don’t remember what your sword did but I think it cut through anything.
That was pretty cool how you could kick ass all the time with that sword but you didn’t need to kill people.
These days they’d make you a killer.
Say, whatever happened to you, anyway? Are you still in the Marvel Universe?

Black Knight,
Not that funny guy,
From the show,
Martin something.
He made a movie with your name.
I bet it wasn’t as awesome as you.

Hulku

Robert Bruce Banner.
Brilliant scientist, maybe.
He can't dodge a bomb?

Night Of The Goblins (Dedicated to Hewitt and Comp)

Norman,
Your sonny, too.
Greenie.
Greenie.
Throwing all your pumpkin bombs.
Making all the young girls moms.
Never got away with cons.

Harry,
Your daddy, too.
Goblins.
Goblins.
Riding on your gliders high.
Throwing Gwen until she dies.
Make all the Parkers cry.

Ned Leeds,
Who are you?
Hobby.
Hobby.
Created from the pen of Stern.
Who used to do the Cap with Byrne.
My favorite kind of plant is fern.

There once was a man named Jameson,
His Op-eds, Spider-Man was not famous in.
He'd blame the Wall-Crawler,
between a yell and a holler.
It was as if heroism became a sin!



Damn that was hard.

Double Poetry Post!

I think "a knob of steel" needs to be worked into EVERY super-hero poem!

IMWAN needs more poetry.

Or maybe less. Like, a lot less.

There once was a fellow named Richards

There once was a fellow named Richards
Who could stretch without bursting his britches
He had adventures sublime
Throughout space and time
And invented stuff that brought him riches

Spiderman is really smart
He invented spandex for a start
Look out villains! Spideys coming !
And his pants help keep his tum in.

In brightest day
In blackest night
JB talks shit
On his website

Let those who worship
Leifeld's might
Beware Byrne's power
Of talking shite

Superman is sad
Being called Supey-Woopey
Happens less and less

Wolverine!
He's a lean mean fighting machine!
When he gets real angry he just goes off the rails
But if he slept with me he'd have to trim his nails.

West Coast Avengers?
Eat less toast ya benders.
Take the Vision apart
Make the Scarlet Witch a tart?
It's something incipient
Comics are drippident.

Martian Manhunter
So large and green and lonely
Loves his Oreos


A shy, withdrawn mutant named Scott
Loved his red-headed teammate a lot
He asked Hank for advice
Hank said, "Hey, roll the dice!
You should shit or else get off the pot!"


And, the lesser-seen cinquain:

Morpheus
Dream Lord
Prince of Stories
Rules the Nightmare Realm
Forever

When Batman and Robin were out fighting crime
How did Alfred spend his time?
Polishing silver and washing the dishes
All according to Master Wayne's wishes?
Or did he sometimes misbehave
And tiptoe down to the batcave
Try on the mask, the cape, the belt
Just to see how it all felt
Striking poses in the looking-glass
Then back up the stairs to smoke some grass.