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 Post subject: Gambling Souls: Ten Handed
PostPosted: Fri May 09, 2008 9:47 pm 
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What do you call a camel with three humps?

Joined: 21 Oct 2004
Posts: 58174
Location: Indiana
Here's the script to Part 2 of my 2000AD digital comic GAMBLING SOULS. Comments appreciated.

GAMBLING SOULS: TEN HANDED

PAGE 1
It's a quasi-final table of 10 players. On one end is Lamprey. On the other end is Callahan. The remaining players are archetypes of various poker players. Don't draw them overly sterotypical. (Thin Vietnamese guy with mustache, larger Chinese guy, even larger American with funny glasses, skinny pale Internet player, short Canadian with a Canuck hockey jersey, black Tiger Woods looking serious guy, white average build Tennessean with a goatee, and an Aussie with a soul patch.)

The button is on the player to Callahan's right, meaning Callahan is in the small blind and has a few chips out already. The player to Callahan's left is in the big blind and has a few more chips than that already in. That puts Lamprey in middle position.

Also, everyone has a single chip in front of them. This is the ante.

There are stanchions around the final table, and behind them "on the rail" we can see the rest of Gambling Souls standing together: Chatter and Trinh. A few people away from them, we can see their rival, Nick Beckett. The rest of the railbirds are random people.

CAPTION: One more out and we're at the final table.

PAGE 2
The dealer finishes dealing the second card to each player. The ante chips are now in the middle, but the blind chips are still in front of the blind players.

CAPTION: We won't be finishing tonight. They're bringing us back in FOUR MONTHS so they can televise it the next day.

PAGE 3
Panel 1
Lamprey looks down at Queen of Hearts - Queen of Clubs. Remember that players peek at their cards at the corners, with the other hand shielding them. I have reference for this maneuver if you need it. If we can see any of the players in the first few positions, they have folded.

Panel 2
He raises, throwing out four chips.
LAMPREY: Raise.
DEALER: Two hundred thousand.
CAPTION: It's anyone's guess how many of us SURVIVE until then.

PAGE 4
Panel 1
The players in between Lamprey and Callahan have folded. Callahan looks at his cards, but it's from the opposite POV so we can't see them. You can see the player to his left looking at his own cards also.

Panel 2
He just calls, throwing out several smaller chips to add to the small blind already out.

Panel 3
The player to the left in the big blind calls, also throwing out a few small chips on top of the big blind.

CAPTION: Millions of dollars at stake. More than enough to KILL for.

PAGE 5
Panel 1
The dealer puts out the flop. It's Ace of Hearts, 10 of Hearts, 6 of Hearts.
Panel 2
Callahan is first to act but does nothing just yet.
Lamprey: Callahan. If we both make the final table, I might have to kill you.
Callahan: I'd definitely kill YOU, Lamprey. I don't like you THAT much.
Panel 3
They laugh.

PAGE 6
Panel 1
Callahan throws out several chips.
DEALER: Five hundred thousand.

Panel 2
The big blind player calls with the same number of chips.

Panel 3
Lamprey is next to act. Close on a reaction shot of Lamprey. He raises his eyebrows.


PAGE 7
Lamprey raises, putting out a small stack of chips.
LAMPREY: Raise.
DEALER: One million. Five hundred thousand more to call.
CAPTION: I'm protecting my nut draw. Fishing to see if he's made a set. I DOUBT he'll call otherwise.

PAGE 8
Panel 1
Callahan pauses for a second, eyes wide.

Panel 2
He peeks down at his cards again.

Panel 3
He looks up again. His face has reddened a bit and he's starting to get a bit angry, though he says nothing.

PAGE 9
Panel 1
Callahan tosses some chips out, a bit more forcefully than before.
DEALER: Call.

Panel 2
The player to Callahan's left tosses his cards in immediately.
PLAYER: It's not THAT good a hand.

Panel 3
As the dealer rakes in the player's cards, we can see Lamprey let a sly grin creep in to his face.

PAGE 10
Panel 1
The turn is a 9c. Callahan bets again, tossing in a stack of chips in one motion.
DEALER: Two million.
Panel 2
Lamprey puts the same amount in.
CAPTION: Now I know he has a set of tens or aces.
LAMPREY: Call.

PAGE 11
Panel 1
The river is the Kh.
Panel 2
Callahan checks by tapping on the table with an open palm.
Panel 3
Lamprey stands up and goes all in immediately, pushing his entire stack in as a group at the base. None of them fall down.
LAMPREY: "All you can eat, Callahan."

PAGE 12
Panel 1
Callahan stands as well.
CAPTION: Callahan's not got much left.
Panel 2 (Make this panel a bit bigger to make room for the caption.)
Callahan stares Lamprey down.
CAPTION: He has to either call down what might be a bluff on my part, or spot the made flush and get out while he still can.

PAGE 13
Panel 1
Time passes. Lamprey turns to the staff member passing by.
LAMPREY: Floor. I need to call time.

Panel 2
The staff member is standing over the table looking at Callahan.

STAFF MEMBER: You have one minute.

PAGE 14
Four square panels.

Panel 1
Different angle. The staff member tells Callahan that he is almost out of time. He has barely moved from 50 seconds ago. If we can see Lamprey, he's got his arms crossed, confident.
STAFF MEMBER: Ten seconds.

Panel 2
Ultimately, Callahan calls, but he doesn't show first.
CALLAHAN: I call.

Panel 3
Lamprey flips the Qh-Qc first.

Panel 4
Callahan shows 10c-10s immediately after.

PAGE 15
Panel 1
Callahan screams, punting his chair up in the air.
Callahan: FUCK!

Panel 2
The chair sails across the room.

Panel 3
The chair lands with a smash in the middle of a ring game, scattering chips and knocking players over!
SFX: SMASH!

PAGE 16
Panel 1
Several security guards are having difficulty dragging the much larger Callahan to the exit, kicking and screaming.

Panel 2
Lamprey rakes in the massive pot. If we can see the board cards, the ones that are HEARTS have been slid up half a card length by the dealer, signifying that the winning hand was a flush.
Lamprey: See you all in November. Or some of you, anyway. It's going to be a long 100 days.


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 Post subject: Gambling Souls: Ten Handed
PostPosted: Thu May 15, 2008 11:04 am 
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Joined: 14 Aug 2006
Posts: 40002
Location: Die, Marti Tracy, die
Glad to see this moving forward, Steve. I really liked your proposal. You've got a great cast of characters.


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 Post subject: Gambling Souls: Ten Handed
PostPosted: Thu May 15, 2008 11:31 am 
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What do you call a camel with three humps?

Joined: 21 Oct 2004
Posts: 58174
Location: Indiana
Thanks, Taft! Part 2 has been delayed on the publisher's end, but the good news is that they might be able to pay us more!


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 Post subject: Gambling Souls: Ten Handed
PostPosted: Fri Jun 13, 2008 9:45 pm 
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What do you call a camel with three humps?

Joined: 21 Oct 2004
Posts: 58174
Location: Indiana
I've gotten permission to post the entire first chapter here. Thoughts appreciated.

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 Post subject: Gambling Souls: Ten Handed
PostPosted: Sat Jun 14, 2008 12:57 pm 
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Emissary to the Prophets

Joined: 25 Dec 2006
Posts: 28198
Location: On the DEFIANT
A little on the "Basil Exposition" side, but that's hard to avoid when introducing a bunch of people for the first time. I'm in.

Nice shout-out to Patterson, by the way!


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 Post subject: Gambling Souls: Ten Handed
PostPosted: Fri Oct 03, 2008 5:29 pm 
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What do you call a camel with three humps?

Joined: 21 Oct 2004
Posts: 58174
Location: Indiana
I did get several criticisms about the exposition, so I cut it way down for Part 2. We just finished the whole thing, and it's going up on clickwheel.net in November. Here's the first five pages:

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What do you all think?


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