8 ET Steps

This is my song parody based on Alanis Morissette's song "8 Easy Steps" from her CD So Called Chaos... in which Alanis contemplates becoming a Teenage ET Mimicker Interstellar Musician.


I'm feeling paralyzed by my own fear of abandonment
How to defer the questions about my new predicament
How to tell everyone that I'm a carbon copy of me
What if it's scares them bad and they all run away from me

Have to keep people at arms length, never let them get too close
Have to instruct the ones who I hold so dear and love the most
I'll just pretend I'm fine and don’t need help from anyone
Trying to hide the fact that I'm now taller than everyone

[Chorus]

They'll teach me all this in 8 ET steps
A course taught in space time I’ll never forget
They’ll make me brand new in 8 ET steps
They'll give me a spaceship to fly, I wing it...I guess

As an ET women I'll always be at my own best
Won't have to play all pious, I'll never be a hypocrite
Travel to the stars, play songs and be a spiritualist
Singing in harmony with Galaxies will be my success

[Chorus]

They'll teach me all this in 8 ET steps
A course taught in space time I’ll never forget
They’ll make me brand new in 8 ET steps
They'll give me a spaceship to fly, I wing it... I guess

I’ll be traveling onward for light-years
I’ll be practicing my a** off
I’ll be living a new life from this moment I swear to you
Culminating just to be a well rehearsed Interstellar songstress

[Chorus]

They'll teach me all this in 8 ET steps
A course taught in space time I’ll never forget
They’ll make me brand new in 8 ET steps
They'll give me a spaceship to fly, I wing it, I...guess

How to leave your World and not be noticed by anyone else
How to keep grounded when you see you’re flying past the Sun
Hard to feel normal when you know you're changing from within
Hard to complain at all when you finally see who you've become

[Chorus]

They'll teach me all this in 8 ET steps
A course taught in space time I’ll never forget
They’ll make me brand new in 8 ET steps
They'll give me a spaceship to fly, I wing it... I guess

You're kind of a whacky chick, ain't ya?

Ummm... I'm a totally unique and expressive sort of person. But if being from another world (Mimicka ) makes me wacky.... then YES!

Btw, I hope you enjoyed the parody. It's for your personal enjoyment.


*** Hands Chris a nice hot cup of asparagus tea and a fresh cup of broccoli yogurt. ***

No worries.

I prefer the company of whacky people. They're far more interesting.

Oh, and I take my asparagus tea with mustard, thank you.

Wow! With mustard! I never thought of that! Good for you!

Ummm... you're also welcome to have some broccoli danishes... and some marmalade and beet soup.

Got any peanut butter and pepperoni ice cream?

I have umm... peanut butter and lessee... some icing sugar with egg nog and strudel. And some pickled onions with tapioca sauce. Marinated, of course.

I'm going to Mimicka for Spring Break.

That might be the strangest thing ever posted on the Writers' Block.

Welcome!

I hope you have a Spacecraft that travels faster than the speed of light.


Anyhoo... I'll see you there.

Thank you. It's good to meet you. I hope you enjoyed my parody. I have written many of them. They're totally fun to write.

*** Bumpity bump bump ***

We should have an IMWAN gathering there as well in addition to the proposed November one at Big Apple Con.

Funny stuff, Francine. You even swore with asterisks!

Thanks, Chris.


I'd be happy to have some members of IMWAN aboard my spaceship for a lunch sometime..